Practice Loving Kindness

"By cultivating attitudes of friendliness toward the happy, compassion for the unhappy, delight in the virtuous, and disregard toward the wicked, the mind-stuff retains its undisturbed calmness.”  The Yoga Sutras. Patanjali, Book 1, Sutra 33

Loving Kindness (Metta) meditation is an ancient Indian practice used to cultivate unselfish and unconditional kindness towards others.

The practice of Loving Kindness can yield remarkable emotional, physical and spiritual benefits.  To help you along with your own practice,  we are pleased to offer some resources and words of inspiration from our GateWay teachers.

Presented here in alphabetical order:

From Becky, a quote from Rumi and heart-opening yoga poses
From Bill, an audio guide to the Dalai Lama's Loving Kindness meditation
From Liz, a quote from Pema Chodron and an easy everyday practice
From Sherry, thoughts on self-love, and quotes from the Dalai Lama, Desmond Tutu and Thich Nhat Hanh
From Slavica, a simple yoga meditation called "Put your hands on your heart"
From Terry, a poem by Rachel Conteni Flynn
More Resources from the Kripalu Center [ps2id id='Becky' target=''/]

From Becky Kollmorgen - a quote from Rumi and a few heart-opening yoga poses

Every contraction is naturally followed by an expansion; every time you feel your heart shrivel, be confident that it will blossom in turn." - Rumi

This quote by the ancient Rumi, the 13th century Persian poet, can be compared to the natural expansion and contraction of our breath, of almost all living beings. And an open heart can expand the most.  Any closed heart is temporary and fleeting️.

In your yoga practice, add some basic heart opening poses, such as lying your upper back on a bolster and allowing arms to fall away from your sides, palms facing upward to receive love.  Or raising your arms into cactus and drawing the elbows back behind you.  Lift your chin and gaze ahead, opening both throat and heart chakras to express love. [ps2id id='Bill' target=''/]

From Bill Buckley - the Dalai Lama's Loving Kindness meditation

Loving Kindness (Metta) meditation is an ancient Indian practice used to cultivate unselfish and unconditional kindness towards others. It is reported to be the Dalai Lama’s favorite meditation.  I am happy to share my version of the Dalai Lama’s Loving Kindness meditation.  I encourage you to practice it, substituting the well wishes that resonate for you.

Sit in a comfortable position, close your eyes and deepen your breathing.  Click to begin:

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From Liz Korabek-Emerson - a quote from Pema Chödrön and an easy everyday practice

"Loving-kindness towards ourselves doesn’t mean getting rid of anything. It means we can still be crazy after all these years. We can still be angry after all these years. We can still be timid, jealous or full of feelings of unworthiness. The point is not to try to throw ourselves away and become something better. It’s about befriending who we are already." - Pema Chödrön

I invite you to try an informal Loving Kindness practice called "Just Like Me." Remember that this person in front of me, or driving behind me or walking along side me – wants to be happy, has sorrows, joys, challenges, loves someone, wants to be loved – just like me.

And if you're wondering if any of this can make a difference, read 18 Science Based Reason to Try Loving-Kindness Meditation, by Emma Seppala, a PhD researcher at  Stanford University and the author of The Happiness Track. [ps2id id='Sherry' target=''/]

From Sherry Evans - thoughts on self love from the Dalai Lama and Desmond Tutu, and a meditation from Thich Nhat Hanh

Self-compassion is closely connected to self-acceptance…but is even more than the acceptance of ourselves.  It is actually having compassion for our human frailties and recognizing that we are vulnerable and limited like all people.  As a result, it is a fundamental basis for developing compassion for others.  It’s hard to love others as you love yourself….if you don’t love yourself,”  Book of Joy.
- the Dalai Lama and Desmond Tutu

We give and we give and we give…to others, often forgetting to take care of ourselves.  It is not selfish to put yourself first.  In order to be able to continue to give to others we must practice self-love, self-acceptance, self-care and cultivate a high regard for the essential, complicated person that we are.  Honor that person; love that person.

Try this simple self-love practice:

1. Standing or seated:  Rub both palms together vigorously creating heat
2. Place one hand on top of the other over your heart with a bit of pressure.
3. With eyes closed, hold this pose and breathe.
4. Repeat!

And a Loving-Kindness meditation from Thich Nhat Hanh:

May I learn to look at myself with the eyes of understanding and love.
May I be able to recognize and touch the seeds of joy and happiness in myself.
May I learn to identify and see the sources of anger, craving, and delusion in myself. [ps2id id='Slavica' target=''/]

From Slavica Popov Meinhold - A simple yoga meditation called "Put your hands on your heart"

Finding some time to listen to your heart and take care of yourself is not a selfishness, it’s a manifestation of love and care for what we need. And when we find kindness, confidence and love within ourselves, we are ready to spread it to the world. This is a simple meditation you can practice everyday for a several minutes. It’s called “Put your hands on your heart,” from Soulful Simplicity by Courtney Carver

Choose a time each day when you can sit alone quietly for a few minutes. Sit on the floor, a chair, your bed, anywhere you feel comfortable, and take a few breaths to settle in and recognize the significance of creating space to listen to your heart. Try practicing in silence, or with soft music. After a few cleaning breaths in through the nose and out through the mouth, close your eyes, turn your gaze down and continue focusing on your breath. Next, place one hand on your heart, and cover your hand with the other. Feel your heart beating. Feel the warmth of your heart and your hands. Now, while continuing to breathe in and out with some intention, and while the feeling the warmth, start a conversation with your heart.

Namaste[ps2id id='Terry' target=''/]

From Terry Farish - a poem by Rachel Contreni Flynn

Poetry has offered a path for me to offer loving kindness to myself and, if I can do that, then to others. An example is the poem below, "Yellow Bowl."  I first read the poem in the poet Ted Kooser's column, "American Life in Poetry."  Then, to my joy, the poet herself, Rachel Contreni Flynn, was a featured reader at the Portsmouth Poetry Hoot last year and she read it. The poem captures a release into mindfulness, into awareness of the small details of a moment as the poet stands in her kitchen. She allows us to watch that moment of mindfulness shift her thought.

Yellow Bowl

If light pours like water
into the kitchen where I sway
with my tired children, 

if the rug beneath us
is woven with tough flowers,
and the yellow bowl on the table 

rests with the sweet heft
of fruit, the sun-warmed plums,
if my body curves over the babies,

and if I am singing,
then loneliness has lost its shape,
and this quiet is only quiet.

by Rachel Contreni Flynn [ps2id id='Kripalu' target=''/]

More Resources:

Download "Straight to the Heart," a wonderful handout from Michelle Dalbec, a lead teacher at the Kripalu Center.  In addition to some historical context, she offers more inspirational quotes and a reading list.